Father’s Day Madness

by | May 27, 2008

Father’s Day Madness

Jeff Summers

May 27, 2008

Now that Mother’s Day is over it is time to start focusing on the important holidays like Father’s Day. I don’t mean that mothers don’t deserve their own holiday I am all for it when a holiday is accompanied by cake. But Mother’s Day is such a girly holiday. It’s just not something guys can get their arms around. I mean Mother’s Day even messes up baseball when players start using pink bats. Who could take anyone seriously when they are swinging a pink bat?

Newspaper ads start to feature cool things like barbeque grills, power tools, and beer goes on sale. Compare that to Mother’s Day when the ads are filled with dresses, picture frames, and floral arrangements. No, Father’s Day definitely kicks butt on Mother’s Day. At least that is what I thought until this morning.

I logged into my email account and found that I had received an email from Babies ‘R Us. I have no idea why I am all of a sudden getting email messages from Toys ‘R Us and Babies ‘R Us. I can’t for the life of me remember ever going into a Babies ‘R Us store in my life so this is definitely not an email sent to loyal customers. I would usually just delete an email like this but the title caught my eye and I had to open it.

The title said “Free Shipping on Great Gifts for Dad!” Who could resist an email like that? I clicked the link. I’m not exactly sure what I was expecting but whatever I was thinking I was pretty sure it wasn’t the products I was offered. I don’t know any father who has been sitting around thinking, “you know what would be a cool gift? A Diaper Dude Diaper Bag!”

I don’t know any guy who was hoping for a Bob Revolution Stroller in Mesa Orange or a Britax Monarch Red Racer Booster Seat let alone a Tike Tech Trax360 Double Pacific Blue Swivel Stroller. And don’t even get me started on the link with the heading, “Now you can stock up on Diapers and Wipes at babiesrus.com”. I challenge you to find me a guy who is just aching for a box of disposable diapers and some sanitary wipes.

This email is an obvious ploy by mothers to try and get back at all the men who gave their wives lawn tools for Mother’s Day. They figure that if we give them a new gas-powered weed eater it is only fair that they give us a Diaper Dude diaper bag. I don’t care if it does come in camo material I still don’t want to get a diaper bag. We deal with crap all year long, the last thing any of us want is to receive a gift that reminds us that we need to clean up more crap.

Ladies let me help you with your shopping dilemma. Guys are ok with getting Harley-Davidson shirts, power tools, hand tools, and any cooking utensil that allows us to cook with open fire. We are also totally cool with anything from the Diamondbacks team shop except for that creepy stuffed pink and purple cat. (What is that thing anyway?) So if you want to make us happy, please don’t let Babies ‘R Us fool you. We seriously don’t want a 96 count box of Huggies no matter how cute you may think it would be to carry them in a hunter camo diaper bag.

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Posted by Jeff Summers

Author, technologist, and baseball aficionado specializing in information technology and developing new and creative ways to interact with the world around us. My goal is to extend the boundaries of what is possible and find ways to make the world a better place while having fun.

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